Columnist for Yahoo Lifestyle Australia, Sophie Dillman. Sophie will provide intimate knowledge about everything from her time on Home and Away to what it’s like to be famous and experience love at work.
The number one question I get asked – When will I have a baby? It honestly surprises me how often this question comes up, and from who.
I am asked when I am going to have a baby every interaction I have with the media, fans and even strangers on the street, who don’t know what I do for work. My point being is I am not special being asked this question. I believe still, in 2023 this is the question that plagues young women their entire childless existence. I do think (THINK) we are past the belief that women belong in the home; but it is evident that society still sees having a child as the pinnacle in a women’s life.
Why is it only women are asked that question?
Because it is still often believed that men have more to life than simply procreating while women do not, I can say with absolute certainty that Paddy will never be asked that interview question if I am not present.
Since you’ve been appearing on television five days a week for so long, your followers are highly interested in your life. I am sincerely appreciative to such people. I have been quite open in the media about many different facets of my life and health because people see you so frequently that they think they know you. But what if I was having trouble becoming pregnant? Suppose I didn’t want to have kids? How are you supposed to explain those things to journalists or complete strangers without feeling the effects?
Can’t find any positives
If I am really honest I do not know how parents do it. Every article I read about pregnancy says its far from magical… more like hell.
Then comes the politics of childbirth, sleeping patterns, going back to work, dummies and breastfeeding. Sh*t if I have just grown another human inside me, you best believe I am going to decide what’s best.
Then comes sleepless nights, parental leave, endless sickness, feeding schedules – all of which no one ever talks about in a positive light. The business of raising children needs a new marketing team because I can’t find ANY positive resources floating around right now.
Of course, finances also must be considered. I currently live in a one-bedroom apartment and the rent is obscenely expensive, how will I ever afford the back yard, the education, the holidays that I was given in my childhood?
What about my career?
The professional sacrifice comes after these anxieties. There is no other option; working women must take time off to give birth and care for their infants; they must be pushed out and fed. Women are pushed down the job ladder as a result of having to balance parenting and returning to work while also being without pay for a while.
The fact that my looks matters in my career adds an additional layer of complexity for me. There is only so much a flowy dress can conceal, and at eight months pregnant, I couldn’t play a lady who isn’t pregnant. Along with being a mother, I will also have a drastically different body after giving birth, which might alter the roles I am eligible for.
There is a lot to consider, and if I’m being completely honest, I’m not ready to think about it. I sincerely hope to one day start a family, but it is really none of your business except mine. Women are the reason we have Monopoly, Rock & Roll, and the ability to wash our hands to kill germs! We are much more than just a period of time for reproductive choices.